But why is that really important?
So, I’m excited. This is my first sports blog. I’m fascinated by sports. I’m fascinated that sports are so popular and so important in this world. Football is the most popular sport in the world: American Football being the most popular in the US and association football or soccer (or futbol but with an accent I don’t know how to do I think) being the most popular everywhere else. But I’m amazed that someone as educated, non-athletic and socially conscious (socially awkward?) as me can spend so much time thinking about sports and particularly about Football (the US variety) and more particularly about Tom Brady and the New England Patriots. Football is not even my favorite sport (that would be basketball) and I’m not even from New England (though I lived there some five years). And yet, I am absorbed in the possibility that they may go undefeated (something only one team has ever done and no team has done since the NFL switched to a 16 game regular season). I read about it constantly on line, watch every game and find myself rooting like a die-hard Boston native for the Pats to win.
Why is this? What part of me is so eager to see this happen? Is it my ego? That I might witness history and will therefore be a part of history? Perhaps. Boredom? Perhaps. Genuine love for the game? I don’t know about that.
And where does the initial obsession come from? From being told that sports are important from a very young age? From actually enjoying playing sports once upon a time? This would lead to vicariously living out every young boy’s (and some girls I’m sure) fantasy to be a professional baller, kicker, jumper, jammer, sticker, tosser, thrower, puncher, putter, pitcher, catcher, caller, hitter, helper, humper, stumper, bumper, hopper, chopper, bopper, topper, tassler, wrastler, blocker, shocker dropper, bell hopper, bomb dropper, puck stopper, belly floppin’ sports guy. But I only ever wanted to play basketball. And I was told I was “the wrong color.” They could have just said I was too short, skinny and slow but honesty has its place too, I guess.
So, what will happened when (I’m feeling optimistic) the Pats go undefeated and win the superbowl? One of two things as I see it. Absolutely nothing. Or…the world will cease to exist as we know it. Democracy will come to Iraq, AIDS will pack it up in Africa and move to Antarctica, the Taliban will become bra-burning feminists and Arnold Schwartznegger will learn how to pronounce California with only four syllables.
So…GO PATS!!! For the future of the world, humankind and linguists everywhere please God guide the Patriots to ten more victories.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
8 comments:
I wish we could all be so idealistic. What's next, you drive an SUV, wave a confederate flag and sing the theme song to Monday Night Football (which considering this blog, you probably do already.)
Take my advice don't allow yourself to get suckered into that droned out version of neanderthalic violence. Little Billy thinks you should take up a hobby like Badminton or Bowling. Anything other than staring into a playful screen while chugging down commodified lager and stale pretzels.
I guess we all have to sell out some time ;-)
Clearly Little Billy, you do not understand satire or sarcasm. Pity.
I wonder why you continually choose to criticize me as a person when you (clearly) do not even know me? Feel free to comment and criticize my ideas and opinions in what I write on this blog but what makes you so insightful into who I am, what I need and what I do outside of this blog???
I enjoy football. I'm not obsessed with it, but I find it fascinating that so many people are. For that reason, I don't even consider watching it (instead of bowling or badminton) a guilty pleasure. If you have something against it why don't you try stating why instead of blindly attacking someone you don't even know???
Little Billy is a doucebag.
I agree with lecollye, if I wasnt in the hospital I would go to the playground and beat lil billy's ass and hang him from the swing set and then throw rocks at him.
Little Johnny from the Hospital
I would like to echo the thoughts of Mr Lecollye and the poor boy in the hospital. In my studies of the Yangtze I have some across a creature that, I believe, spawned little Billy. It is known as the Yangtze Mud Crab (Lazilous Doucheus). This dispicable creature feeds off of creatures around it. It has very little to offer its environment therefore it feels the need pick apart things that it sees. Having almost zero skill set the Doucheus trys to involve itself in other symbiotic relationships and creative processes only to disrupt the natural order of things. There is however a solution to the Mud Crab and that is a strict regimen of pointing out how pathetic the creature is. We at the Yangtze Marine Conservatory used this technique to drive out our Doucheus infestation.
Best of luck
Professor Wong
University of Shanghai
Head of the Yangtze Marine Conservatory
Awww poor Dr. H. you apparently have no real conceptualization of satire or sarcasm. Pity. If you didn’t get it then I’ll spell it out for you now, I was being facetious.
I never denied the fact that I'm a douchebag, but then again neither did you.
Did my attack on football really get your panties all in bunch? Clearly someone as intelligent as you shouldn't take it so seriously. Come on now, as hobbies I suggested “badminton” and “bowling”!!! Would croquet, cricket or goldfish be better indicators of sarcasm?
I read your blogs because I'm fascinated, and I have the right to express my mind. You do, and it just so happens that you place it within a forum that enables others (like me) to read and respond to it as well.
Learn to take criticism with a grain of salt, no matter who it is that dishes it out. I can take it, why can't you? I never stated that I didn't know you, so don't presume to think otherwise. Such degrees of separation are a lot closer than you might think.
Anyhow, I think alternative perspectives other than, "hey that's great", or other forms of ass kissing should be relegated to people who can't critically think of something insightful to say. Now, I'm not saying I'm insightful, just amused enough to share how impressed I am with your blogs. Some people don't always know how to compliment appropriately. If my statements really hurt you I apologize. If anything (at least by me), any response is better than no response at all.
Little Billy thinks Dr. H needs to deviate away from sociopathic notions of swing sets and bullies, and maybe he should consider reading “The Four Agreements”. It might lighten your load. Just a suggestion.
Dear Little Billy,
Thanks for leaving a thoughtful comment that I can appreciate. Am I too sensitive to criticism? Sometimes. But in this case, only when I feel that I am being personally attacked without cause. And I feel that many of your comments have been directed at me, not at the ideas expressed in this blog. It wasn't the football comment, it was the collection of your comments that made me respond negatively. And just so you know, there's a big difference between satire and sarcasm. Sarcasm can't always be picked up on just by reading (we need a new font for that) and your comment(s) do not quite scream satire to me. Takes more than being facetious to be satirical.
Moving on.. I do appreciate that you comment, whether I agree with you or not. The point of this blog is to spark conversation and at least we're doing that.
Glad to hear you're a fan. Looking back at your comments, you have in fact left some thoughtful comments on the content of the blog. Thanks for that. Hope you'll continue to read, continue to comment and if I feel you are attacking ME and not the blog I'll just assume that it's not intentional, that it's just because you're a douchebag. And you're right, I have not denied the possibility of being a douchebag myself.
Now, I must get some sleep for my badminton tournament tomorrow. Afterwards I'm buying a new bumber sticker for my hummer! I always liked the "These Colors Don't Run" one, but I might just go with "Guns Don't Kill People, Guns Kill Dinner."
Ummm... Good to know. It's nice when us douchebags can come together, if only for a short while.
I don't know if I'll be commenting any time soon. But if the inspiration hits, maybe I'll drop in and say hello.
Now sleep well dear Dr. And score a couple tomorrow for me. ;-)
Post a Comment